Moon Mystery — Maniac Muslim

Nov 5

Nov 5 Moon Mystery

Written by: Hamzah Moin I can’t blame Saudi Arabia for ALL the moon-sighting problems… sometimes the problem arises from bizarre moon-watchers claiming they saw some “moon-like” object. Having Eid prayers on different days may not seem “united”, but it inevitably always happens every year. Why is this? Because sometimes people think they see the moon but it’s not really a moon.

I will attempt to dissect this Moon Mystery by analyzing the “What ifs”

WHAT IF... IT WAS A BIRD?

Probably the most common of moon-sighting problems... these winged creatures often get mistaken as a "moon" because of the "moon-like" pattern the birds fly in. To some Hilal watchers, "flying-in-moon-like-pattern" is basically just as good as "moon".

WHAT IF... IT WAS A PLANE?

The mechanical version of the bird, planes are often mistaken because of the flashy lights that appear on the side of it. The moon has blinking flashing lights and moves across the horizon in three minutes as well which is why I’m sure the mistake occurs all the time.

Moons tend to have wings and say "American Airlines" or "British Airways" written at the side of it as well. How can Eid NOT be tomorrow when the moon has flown across the horizon several times during the evening?

WHAT IF... IT WAS SUPERMAN?

Oh that would be so cool if Superman was Muslim. If only Superman can go fly over the world in the opposite direction of the earth really fast and cause it to spin backwards thus going back in time and telling the world what the REAL moon decision is because then we won't be having any problems. If it worked in Superman1 then it should work all the time.

Mosque politics are as corrupted as Lex Luthor so SuperMuslim can handle that stuff too. Hush-hush elections? Same mysterious people in power for 20 years? SuperMuslim can put a stop to all that!

WHAT IF... IT WAS A PTERODACTYL?

Less likely than Superman but I’d believe that over Saudi any day.

WHAT IF... IT WAS THE SUN?

It’s a lunar calendar. Staring at the sun and scorching your eyeballs will not bring about Eid. Though I’m sure some people are willing to do it to get a three-day weekend.

You ever wonder how they make the announcement for Eid several hours before the moon even comes out? This is why. Sun is just as good as the moon for some people.

WHAT IF... IT WAS AN ELEPHANT?

This actually only raises more questions.

WHAT IF... IT WAS A JET STREAM?

It’s quite rare for a jet to fly with such curvature to form a moon-like pattern but people still make the mistake with jet streams and the moon. Unless of course you come from the camp that believes that the kufaar are against us and want to divide us by any means necessary so the kafir pilot flies curvedly to form a “jet-stream-moon” to disunite the Muslim community on Eid. Diabolical kafirs and their diabolical methods.